HEADLINES FROM 2001

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8 January 2002
Sam Markewich

MOTHER NATURE MISTAKEN FOR AL QUEDA MEMBER,
KILLED IN CAVE BOMBINGS

ALBINO CAVE-DWELLING SKINKS MASSACRED BY US
BOMBS

HUMMER JEEPS SERIOUS DETERENT FOR SUICIDE
BOMBERS ON BAY BRIDGE


ENRON PLACED ON US GOV. TERRORIST LIST


CONSUMERS BUY MASSIVE QUANTITIES OF BULLSHIT
ABOUT PATRIOTISM, SHOPPING

NEW YORK CITY SLATED TO BECOME MAJOR
CORPORATION SAYS NEXT MAYOR

BUSH, MISSILE DEFENSE: I SEE B.M.

U.S. TELLS WORLD, “IF YOU’RE NOT ON OUR SIDE, WELL
FUCK YOU THEN!”

WHITE MEN PROFILED AS INNOCENT WIN TRILLIONS
IN DISCRIMINATION SUIT

WOMEN REMOVE VEIL IN AFGANISTAN; U.S G
OVERNMENT DONS VEIL IN AMERICA

BUSH POPULARITY AT 80%, COMPETING WITH NBC’S
“FRIENDS”

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